By Lindsay Crane

A hilarious new collection of the worst poetry ever composed, by authors both eminent and obscure. Walt Whitman enigmatically wrote, “Did you fear some scrofula out of the unflagging pregnancy?” And Keats exclaimed, “I am wound up in deep astonishment!” Extracts short and extended are by poets from the sixteenth to the twenty-first centuries.

Nowhere else will you find such gems as these:

Here come and sit where never serpent hisses,
And being set, I’ll smother thee with kisses.

The poem makes truth a little more disturbing,
Like a good bra, lifts it and holds it out in both hands.

Included are an introduction, commentary on each poet, and a daffy index with such entries as these:

Axe, descending, causes condemned men to smile, p. 56.
Creatures, scaly, urged to steal from flying lips, p. 22.

This is a worthy and unmissable sequel to the classic and oft-reprinted The Stuffed Owl. Illustrated, with subject index and author index. 154 pages.

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Having discovered the original Stuffed Owl while at college, Crane made it her mission to archive as many additional poetic monstrosities as attracted her notice while she was otherwise engaged, and has now accumulated enough material to form a collection and offer it to an eager public.

Available at barnesandnoble.com, amazon.com, and other online vendors. E-book coming soon.